My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
