So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
