She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
True college students do jello shots in the library
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
