Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
