it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
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