just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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