Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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