i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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