it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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