I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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