Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
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Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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