Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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