I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
