I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
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