So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Randomize
