Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
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My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
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It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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