I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Randomize
