very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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