Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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