Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
