You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.