Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
