I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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