ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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