Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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