last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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