Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
not ubering you a puppy
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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