I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
