I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize