Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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