Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize