Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Just puked most of my soul out..
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