So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
How does one acquire holy water?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
