kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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