i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I'm really busy with my period
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