Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize