That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
