drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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