You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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