I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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