But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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