In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
