I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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