Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize