I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
