Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
