Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
