Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
