Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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