Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
