I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Randomize
